i finish my stage lighting exam. not very gd. but hais. okay la suan liao! LOL tml is the killer! VCVS! i must jia you k! =D i hope someone is nice enough to bring me a mocha frap but nah, that's not gonna be happening! LOL

i really hope that i can make it for tml's exam! pray hard it's not that difficult! haisssss

insecure

Emo

Who cares?

whoohoo 1st time i watch live online! my candace parker! so hot! =xx she damn zai lah! if i'm her jiu hao! den no need jump liao=xx can dunk also ah! my progress on revision is damn slow! must jia you tml! cant wait to meet 8s for Popeye tml!

i today lao sai 2 times! haha but okay alr. sian too lazy to study. but still gt study abit. hahaha! shen li must jia you! 4 more days to end of exams!!! =D

just gt home from rong hs. haha! debra was there. but she left first. den gera bing n tina came. had fun watching tv n joking around. walked back home BRAVELY! lol! anyway i almost creep-ed out! haha!

stubborn n temperamental

and grateful that i still have my private blog

went to sch in the aftn. kinda bored. reach quite early. copied tutorials! haha! cos i dont have my tut 3 n 4. went hm after that. played maple and slp n played maple. no mood to study at all. watch some shu qi's movie! haha too bored alr.

星星添满了天空
成了一幅画
我和你躺在草地上
吹着那轻柔的夜风
彼此看着对方
那幸福又甜蜜的感觉
此时此刻
我们似乎融合成一体
永远活在彼此的内心

went to suntec in the morning!
haha i shan't blog about the stupid stuff i did while on my way home.

went to to play maple. level up my mage before went to slp on my super comfy bed! LOL! smelling my BABY is always so GREAT and ADDICTIVE! haha
woke up ard 6 plus n watch my FU QI YOU AN KANG! omg BLUE is damn HOTTTTTTT.. nose bleed=xx i think he more shuai than he jun xiang and zheng yuan chang! hahaha!=x i'm so in love with him!

today ate alot! kinda spoil my day cos i wanted to eat less=x went to study at teck whye mac. lover, gera, rong, jo, tina n sharon were there! haha! sharon left with shaun first. we all left ard 2 plus! haha! n so i just got home now! finish watching my fu qi you an kang! i'm so called waiting for lover to finish studying before i go slp! hee..

tml need wake up early.. buy present n head back to sch for remedial. need wear AVT shirt=( i'm kinda too fat for it siol! damnnnnn

i must learn that the harder i hold onto something, it's even harder for u to stay.

been a great day.. except some spoilers. shan't say where n who. watched where got ghost! i think it's funny! but i scared when talking bout the 2nd story! LOL! headed to pizza hut for dinner! =D

went to meet rong to find hui li at work. den shop awhile jiu go meet gera. haha! talk talk talk until 3 den reach home!

lao sai-ed! must be the damn pizza! LOL eat too much! ytd eat so lil den today ate back! kns!

gg to suntec sign contract ltr at 10am! haha! hope the pay is gd! and also the colleagues. \

BING JIA YOU FOR EXAMS!


I shouldn't love you but i want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but i can't move
I can't look away

And i dont know how to be fine when i'm not
Cause i don't know how to make the feelings stop

Just so you know
This feelings takin control
Of me and i can't help it

had been mapling for the past few days. i think i should start studying next wk. i miss geraldine my dog=( so long nv see her alr!

today rong hui li n 跌破啦 came to my hs. lol! had lots of fun stuffs.. haha den i went to newton for joan's 21st bday party. left earlier with coach=D went to town walk walk eat eat. supposed to watch movie but all selling fast or sold out=( thinking of place to slack but cant think of 1. so we sit ard awhile den we went back hm.

it's true i don't know how to console people. but whatever, do u think i wanted to be like this. =.-

i **** you

i went knocking on doors but its always locked

sian. mood not gd. nt feeling gd bout tml's test. studied alot but somehow nth seems to go in.

用笑容来伪装自己的心酸

title - far away
artiste - nickelback

This time, This place
Misused, Mistakes
Too long, Too late
Who was I to make you wait
Just one chance
Just one breath
Just in case there's just one left
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

One my knees, I'll ask
Last chance for one last dance
'Cause with you, I'd withstand
All of hell to hold your hand
I'd give it all
I'd give for us
Give anything but I won't give up
'Cause you know,
you know, you know

That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I miss you
Been far away for far too long
I keep dreaming you'll be with me
and you'll never go
Stop breathing if
I don't see you anymore

So far away
Been far away for far too long
So far away
Been far away for far too long
But you know, you know, you know

I wanted
I wanted you to stay
'Cause I needed
I need to hear you say
That I love you
I have loved you all along
And I forgive you
For being away for far too long
So keep breathing
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore
not leaving
Hold on to me and, never let me go
keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go
keep breathing
Hold on to me and, never let me go

somehow some parts of the song felt like me. but this is my all time fav=D

it hurts when u expect something which in the end didnt happen the way u wanted it to be. hence it's always gd not to expect anything from anybody.
anyway i'm nt always that happy as u guys seem to know me. but somehow i gg to start building tall cold walls around me like i used to be.

i had accumulated 3 sleepless night. i dont know why. stress? or thinking too much..

OMFG! WHAT'S FUCKING WRONG WITH MY DESKTOP MANNNNNNNNNNN. KNN. FACEBOOK KEEP CANNOT COMMENT! DEN NEED USE LAPPY DEN CAN! IRRITATING SIOL

omg someone pls save me from bryan! hahaha

i know he's cute...
but very naggy leh! LOL

i guess i'm alright now=D thanks to tina for being there for me. i guess i really needed someone! =D love love k! haha

went to gera hs for steamboat. haha! nice n fun! but end up have to hong her bro again. lol! n in a rush, i forgot to take back my steamboat stuffs! shit man! need go back her house some day! n i still forgot to pass gera her contact lens=.-

anyway everything is so fun today! we even went down to play with the fire sparks and lao ying zhua xiao ji. well being the lao ying n mu ji is damn tiring! but being the xiao ji is damn exciting! hahahaha!

SWEET SWEET LOVEEEEE:):):):):)

everything doesnt seems so right for 2 days.. and accumulative

i dont know how to put it.

training was pissed and sad.
pissed with the stupid drills and sad for the game i had after the whole training. i am really sad. and i really mean it this time. i had never felt so lost before. i never felt so lousy before. i had never been blamed before. it wasnt good. it wont be. i was so lost playing a qian feng. i didnt know what to do. they dont seem to understand. i felt like giving up. but i cant. cos i know coach has been giving me support. i felt like giving up basketball and stackers. but i really cant because of coach and the friends there like shi min flo huiling jia qian sumei. i cant bear to. it's the first time i felt this way. i felt so ashamed of myself. i felt that i shouldn't wear my np jacket with bball behind cos i aint fit to. i wanted to stop bball a long time ago bcos of my knee. but because of frens and gaolao treating us so nice, i felt that i shouldnt give up on myself. but this time it's really ...

school aint great either. so many projs and tests. friends whom i tot used to be close and fun tgt arent there anymore. i think the problem lies with me again. they are frens whom i used to think that we will last forever. but it doesnt seems to be now. frens whom i cherished.

ytd the talk on the phone. i felt damn lousy even though i sounded alright. i dont know everything bout u. but u seem to know so much about me. i'm so not sensitive enough to take notice about it. i felt so useless.
and sorry, i didnt mean to say that. i didnt know u dont like it.

while on my way home.. tears just gushed out. i couldnt control. it's the first time. i controlled my tears in the train. but i cant help it anymore. and to come and think what really do i have.. sorry to say it, i somehow feel that i really do only have my parents. what i wanted most is a really big hug from mummy. but i dont want her to know that i'm sad. i felt even more alone when there's so many ppl around me. what i need is a shoulder. i cant take it anymore. i broke down. i'm nt as strong and happy as what u guys seems to see. i hide myself. at some point of time, i really wanted to cut myself like i used to do. but i cant cos i promised someone. i felt like smoking, but i know that aint gonna help me. i need something to release the stress in me. somehow i wished a car could just knock me unconscious and everything out of me so that i can choose what to rmb. and to think how much i failed as a fren to others. i am never a good listener, i am never a good talker, i am never a good friend.

who really understands me... no one i guess.

people take what i said like it's a joke

i'm better off alone like i always do

i'm in sch now. congrats to serene for playing jus now!

help out for fahmi's show. den did some video. thanks mr seah for treating us mac dinner! n thanks for giving us so much things to learn!

i wonder did coach play today...

did proj after the show. well wei wei went crazy. dunno she ok mah not.

n that isaac keep disturb me! always bully my ears! sensitive lah deyyyyyyyyyyy...

i force bing to say she miss me! HAHA! damn high! =xx

tml's fri!! so happy!

i hate the coming wk

my interview was a success

i miss so many ppl!

most is coach cos i dint see her for 1 wk plus alr!
i dont know how to tell gaolao bout my attachment stuffs! cos it's kinda no standard working hours. haissssss... i dont wanna leave stackerssssssssss

i wish geraldine yap si min is alright now cos she doesn't sound soooo...
and i miss 8s alot alot.. cant wait to see them. hvnt seen them ever since clubbing..
and and and i so wanna go clubbing again cos it's so damn fun!!!

i only had 1 wk plus of hols aft my exams and before my attachment!!!!!!!!! i dont hv enough time to playyyyyy.. n i wanna catch up with serene

p/s I MISS LEE YET BING! haha

today boring! went to sch in the morning to do video editing! den meet gera n vincent for lunch cos gera went to repair her lousy lappy! ate duck rice! nice yoo.. n that gera insists we take cab. den to my hs.

continue using final cut to help her do her project work. well i think it kinda sucks cos i started from 4 plus do until 10plus den finish! but 7plus - 9pm went out to take my bursary! whoohoo! 1.2k in my acc! lol! and another 500bucks this sat! swee lah! lol

pimples has been popping out! all because of that stupid stressful work in sch! damn. i'm too tired to study for tml's lighting quiz! well i think i can only depend on my common sense liao.. =(((

internship interview tml mrng at 1030am!!!!! wthhh! suntec! meeting swine for breakfast! 930AM! damnnn.. gonna wake up at 8am liao! so tired! wish me good luck n pass the internship alright! hais... i'm so lacking of self confidence! tina toh pls give me yours!!!!!!!

clubbing in 1 word is FUN!

ade drunk!!! lalala! first time see her drunk! cos we ordered torpedo for her! LOL!

happy birthday ade!!!!!!!!

and also happy birthday xiao jie