seriously i'm not in a gd mood. not in any mood to talk or laugh. just feel like being alone! i dont know why

it's been raining almost the whole day! the temperature's alright! but i dont know why there's still feng shi on my right knee and ankle. ankle especially! PAIN SIA¬.¬ argh~ went for drum n headed home as the rain spoil my plans of gg to ball with shu min they all~ there will be a next time! i'm kinda bored now~ anybody have any nice or new songs to send me?! hahaha! i miss my CANDACE PARKER! esp watching her game highlights online! lol

whoo~ today go out with my love. went to eat pizza hut at lot 1. thanks for the treat my love~ hahaha! then we went down to jp as usual. wait for jo n rong to finish work. so we went to catch a movie! my treat this time! 10bucks sia! GV ex! hahaha! plus seats no gd ah! =x wan yee working candy bar today! =) we watch confession of a shopaholic! nice movie sia! 8/10! for me la! =x i think gera watch until like gg to cry? hahaha=x went to her hs after that with jo n rong~

jo must cheer up k! i know it's hard, but u'll have to accept the fact! i believe there are some more better guys out there for u! jia you!

well i guess i kinda miss my old blog! haha i will post some super private post up there=)))

dis*********

super duper vulgar post. dont read it if u cant stand vulgarities!

I'M JUST GONNA FUCKING STAY AT HOME FOR 2 WHOLE FUCKING DAYS N BEING SO UNHAPPY AND NOT GG TO TALK! SEE WHETHER ARE THEY HAPPY SEEING ME BEING LIKE THAT OR NOT!

damn sia. not as if i go out drink smoke kill gamble! just simply TALKING! aso not that i late go home den my studies like fucking shit or got kicked out of school! no, my results are my best this for this semester. what they say? nothing! not even a word of praise, a word of 肯定! people are always like that! they just simply look at your bad points! n everything they remembered bout u is just all your cb bad points! good things are easily forgotten! also not as if i scold u everyday or what. u dont say me i dont say u! so simple, yet hard to understand! pig brain!

is not that i dont want to go home. i want to go home! but i hate gg back home. bcos i'm always ALONE! face computer alone, slp alone, do everything alone! they just dont understand the feeling of being alone, no one to talk to at home not like when u have ur siblings! they dont ask bout me, dont ask bout my sch, dont ask bout my frens! they just fucking ask bout my EXAMS! =.- lj thinking.

they will just never try to understand me. they fcking show concern is a damn way like asking me home! ya that's my fcking dad's concern! they will never learn to trust me! always asking me to bathe bathe bathe! as if my body is his! i shuang i will go bath alr mah, common sense la dey!

n they fcking say i keep spending alot of money! ya i spend money, but i spend le if no money i wont go eat n spend even more money le mah! ya his money! when i fcking work n got my pay, i throw money on his cb face n he'll LL!

n say i'm not concern bout them. i just dont do what they fcking want me to do = make them worry = not concerning bout them! i dont show out my concern cos i dunno how to doesnt mean i'm fcking not concern bout them la! aiya, wadeva i say they just dont get it! what for! no use talking some sense into them like no use they talking their sense into mine!

okay i'm in a fucking bad mood! bye

omg aint he cute?! haha! he's my biao nephew! hahahaha! i dont really know his name. but i think is something like jervin or what de! LOL! i keep playing with him when i'm at my uncle's hs! haha! he cried when i left la! omg~ so cute right!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope he's mine la! HAHA!

today sentosa trip was spoiled by the rain! haha! but we met up still. only me flo shi min n coach went for the movie! paul blart mall cop! it's nice lah! funny! n the storyline not bad! =) wan yee working! so long didnt see her! her hair longer n longer! gg to be like rupenzel! aiya dunno how u spell! haha the disney char~ then went back home b4 gg out to meet rong, jo, gf, n ade. went back while they went to watch movie cos i cant stay out too late.

met coach n jia qi cos they were at yew tee~ slack awhile den 1030pm reach hm~ quite a fruitful day! tml having training at 6pm! sian! who wanna meet me before that?! LOL!

this relationship is getting tiring! oh my. i hope all the problems come to an end. cos i'm afraid what i'll do to the relationship when i'm tired. i had experienced it before.

today didnt play much for the frenly. omg la, i think gaolao really treat me very well. very gan dong! haha! so i cannot let him down also! he super concern bout me lor! even noticed that i look very restless recently! i love gg out with coach n frens~ makes me feel so happy and just be myself. no worries n everything!

tml i'm gg to sentosa~ gdgd thing! hahaha! the day i will become black! muahahaha! omg, i'm preparing for my marriage=x to Negros! n i might see my lovely n cute gf! hahaha!

对他的好不是来自于喜欢
而是真单纯的想对他好
象以前我对另一个他那样=)

seriously i think i'm gg to hell when i die lor. everyday go home so late make parents worry! maybe i choose wrongly ... bah! i've never been like this before man! shit! so ppl, stop asking me out unless is those wont go home late that kind de! lol! n i shall stop asking ppl out. shld have stayed at home play maple until i go siaoooooooo! HAHA! okay seriously today was neither in a gd mood. maybe is bcos of what ppl said. but it's been like this for 18++yrs le. so i should be immune to it now! n some actions shld be taken! who ask me so ***! how i wish i'm ****! so nobody would say me. even though i look alright, but deep down even though i knew u were jk, who in the world out there wont get hurt. okay maybe i was just being too sensitive!

shen li jia you!

怎样坚强也隐藏不了我对你的思念与为你流的眼泪

lucky i posted in time. well, every year... 21st march. i always think bout u. never fail. i thought i've moved on. but i guess not. maybe there's still a place for u in my heart some where.. it's hard. 3 years.. not easy to move on. esp the reason for the breakup even though we knew that at that point of time, both of us were so in love with each other. i hate this feeling. i hate it when i'm still living in the past.

why is that so difficult to move on?

思念着那美好的过去

today is boring dayyyyy~ n money spending day~ spent like fcking 48bucks in total?! omfg! okay i'm into vulgarities again~ so many probs now!

i dunno how to continue..

it's not that i dont appreciate him waiting for me to be home b4 gg to slp. but it's kinda super duper irritating when he calls like every 5-10mins?! i know it has been quite stress recently due to the lower amount of pay due to no work, n i doesnt seem to do anything to save money! wtf!

to think of it now i'm just like a bai jia nv pls! fck it la! okay i shall try to cut down on my spendings now! so just dont ask me to eat expensive stuffs or ask me to eat. cos i can 1 stone kill 2 birds which is while saving money, i can lose some weight n cut down on my meals!

now whole world is all bout money money money~ qian x4 bu gou yong! fck the lehman brothers! but gd thing bout money is they let u see through who is willing to sacrifice money for u, who is true to you and who u can trust or dont trust!

result sucks! i know to many of u out there might think that my result is good, and i have no rights to complain bout it. but if u were in my shoes, in my class, in avt, u will know how stress it was not to score a gpa3.5 or higher in every sem. cos if u dont reach that, u might be the bottom 5 in class, maybe even bottom 10 in whole cohort. u might not get the attachment u want.

in super bad mood today! maybe alot of things..
1. family
2. money
3. results
4. friends
5. i screwed up my life!

looks like i've told the wrong person bout results~ sorry gf! i forgot bout urs~ damn my fucking low eq la! x.x

i was like kinda shock when i got back my results~ it's like no As at all?! i totally cant believe it man! it's like i expected at least an A for maybe the iTunes module?! hais. they moderate A LOT for the results lor! cos i think our class did fcking well for all modules until they moderate it until like FREE like that!

u wont unstd the stress, the competitiveness in such a class. that u will try to do ur best in order not to be in the bottom of the class even though u think that the results is gd for u.

你真的不了解我

whoo~ just came out from maple! 2x exp from 2-4! shiok daoooo~~ LOL but now damn tired from mapling! hahaha! see i'm so bored until it's the 2nd post for the day! =x n omg i'm getting RESULTS tml 9am!!!!!!! ahhhhh i scared sia! hope gpa higher than 3! =(

又有谁真懂我

i'm sick~ =( my frens ard me are sick too! so get well soon people~ didnt go for np bball camp=x went yuna chalet in the first day! fun man, even though we didnt go any fun places=x den n to meet gera n frens to have steamboat b4 gg to k with gera rong hui li n tina~ slept throughout the whole day ytd. from 1 plus slp until 11 plus am jus nw=x but gt wake up for dinner awhile. i'm now fucking bored at home! pls pls pls someone pls jio me out! LOL

today sian! i lose mahjong again! $4 sia~ total lose bout 20 alr sia minus those win de! but happy outing with ade my love bing rong n bryan! lol! went ps eat the dunno what manhattan fish stuff! my salmon was alright~ but they said the fishes in fish n co are nicer! LOL!

kinda tired now! hahaha but webcam with my love so fun! cos not alone~ at home alone very boreddddddddd de lehhhhh~ n can see nerdyz rong jo n joyce(nerdyz gf) lol! i miss genting genting genting!!!!!!!

什么是真心?

seriously i dont know what's happening to me these few days! i'm having a super bad mood! plus i made a big fuss out of super little small stuffs at home which is just so not me! today is seriously just not my damn fucking day man! tell me why am i feeling like this man! feels like i'm bursting out anytime soon! someone please save me!

sometimes i really hate my horoscope. cause sometimes being like a scorpio makes people think that i'm spoilt! okay, what's the definition of spoilt? i guess different people have different view about this. okay whatever it is, i suddenly felt that i hate myself for being so myself so much!

NO I'M NOT ALRIGHT!

seriously i dont understand why must there be comparison! n i'm really affected by what u said. i also didnt say that oh i'm very pro or whatsoever!

okay i shall not let this affect my day which is gg to be bad enough alr cos i'm having training ltr at 3pm, n it's gonna be tough! n after gg to genting, i really doubt myself whether if i can run anot! i seriously need to improve for women's open and youth cup! esp my stamina!

i skipped ytd's trng. was to lazy to go down! it doesnt seem to have anything for me to stay on alr.. i dont know why..

whooohooo i'm back from genting this aftn! but us got back home cos i went to my love house play mahjong! LOL! with rong n tina~ but i'm kinda hot tempered today cos i come ... ytd=x ok shall nt elaborate much~ let me tell u bout the genting trip=DDDD

the food there is fcking expensive! u really have to use the F word=x a small cup of ice milo can cost u 7 dollars plus rm after the government tax! LOL! but the shops that sell clothes there is quite cheap! n the arcade there is damn big! well i really have to announce my highest score with gera together! we broke the high score of the machine! 458! weets~

the theme park was alright! some rides are boring though! cant compare it with taiwan de=x but i seriously wanted to try the superman the next time i go genting again! nice experience! but overall it's fun cos we're tgt!

me tina gera jo rong head down to KL on third day by cable car then 'cab'! whoohoo~ the cable car is fast n highhhhhhhh~ quite scary though! me jo n rong dint bought anything! but nice experience! on the way back, past by batu caves! omg i really wanted to go there!!!! x.x

pictures next post when i'm not lazy to upload them=x hahaha!

p/s: HOPE NEXT TIME FULL 8S CAN GO TOGETHER ON THEIR OWN!!!!! XD

whoohoo~ i'm back from melaka! haha! i miss there alr! i miss shu hua~ hahaha! thanks to her for lending me laptop n entertaining me, talking to me n play with me! love her many many as a cousin! LOL! went to take neoprint tgt also=x cool huh! 1st neoprint ever since sec 4! =x p/s i'm 19 now! >.< i still rmb i was laughing at ashlee for being 19=x she's gonna be 21 this yr! how time flies man! n bad news. i'm fatter agn! =x i think dunno how many % liao la! i simply jus look like a BALL! oh god! i need to do some exercise le! run run run! ball ball ball! haha! i jus came back from slacking session with part of 8s n ber! hahaha! n that geraldine yap si min! buay si tiam! fall down twice! first time injured her leg n JO! aiyoyo! 2nd time injured her hand! she like monkey like tat! climb up n down the play ground! die die want go up de roof! aft that we took cab home! my 'expensive' hand flagged a 7-seater cab! LOL! always de leh! that time merc now 7-seater! aiyoyoyo!

whoohoo~ seems like i'm blogging everyday now. thanks to my lovely cousin NG SHU HUA to lend me her laptop everyday! lol. n she says rong rong is better looking than tina! hahahaha! i think ah... when tina sees this she's gonna feng diao. so ppl pls prepare to call ambulance for her! LOL=x i ate alot alot today. having lots of fun here. but hor.. i'm quite irritated by mum. everywhere also dun want go. cousin wan drive us up kl she also dont want=.- come overseas is to have fun ma. not come here gossip here n there! buay tahan her sia!!!! >.< yao si lor. totally felt like giving her attitude. but i really did show some! =x